This story is in part inspired by my friend and burlesque performer and MUA Ally Katte‘s Christmas routine – Krampus. The below pictures of Ally performing the act were taken by the amazing Tony Barrett Powell
Little Jimmy (for it is inevitably a Little Jimmy in stories such as this, and we can assume that this is the definitive Little Jimmy), had started the evening fast asleep. The evening in question, being Christmas Eve, this was not unusual or unexpected. In fact, being Christmas Eve it was equally usual and expected that at 1 minute past midnight Little Jimmy awoke in eager anticipation.
As many of his friends were doing at that same moment, Little Jimmy was wondering if Father Christmas (Santa Claus or Saint Nicholas if you prefer) had yet visited. He further wondered what gifts might appear for him under the Christmas tree or in the stocking at the end of his bed. He had absolute confidence that Father Christmas would not only visit, but also leave gifts that he could enjoy in the coming days.
Little Jimmy lay in his bed being as quiet as he possibly could until finally he heard the soft creaking of the floorboards outside his room. In his excitement he completely forgot the advice his parents had given him many times throughout the year –
“Jimmy be good or else you will have no gifts for Christmas”
“Jimmy put that down now! If you keep on like this there will be no Christmas gifts for you.”
“Jimmy leave your sister alone or Christmas will be cancelled – no gifts for you!”
“Jimmy if you hit her one more time…”
As Little Jimmy sat up in his bed to eagerly watch the door and catch Father Christmas in the act of delivering his presents, he forgot what his sister, Little Ally, had told him only a few hours earlier.
“You are so mean Jimmy” she had spluttered through tears as she held the arm he had just twisted painfully behind her. “It would serve you right to get no gifts at all.”
What Little Jimmy had not considered is that Little Ally was correct and he really did not deserve the gifts he presumed to be just beyond his bedroom door. He had not considered at all that his bad behaviour might result in punishment rather than reward. He only considered this as the door opened.
In the sliver of moonlight that came through his bedroom window, he could see in the doorway a beast of magnificent proportions. With long horns and cloven hoofs, it was monstrously beautiful and fiercely savage.
Although Little Jimmy wished to scream, he found his throat was dry and his voice had been stolen by his fear. Little more than a gasp came out as the creature took a few short strides from the door to his bed and pulled a sack from over its shoulder. Little Jimmy’s eyes widened with fear as the sack came down over him, and he could not help but be intrigued and disturbed that the beast’s face resembled that of his sister.
The creature turned and strode from the room, back down the stairs and out of the house with the silent Little Jimmy slung over its shoulder. Little Ally stood watching it leave, no fear apparent for she had no reason to be scared of the same fate.
As they left the house Little Ally whispered after them “Merry Krampus Jimmy, merry Krampus!”.